I am an albino amphibi-lizard. Your argument is irrelevant.

[shadesofmauve]

My sleep schedule is totally and completely borked. On saturday I slept for over ten hours and still had big coon circles under my eyes, then I spent all day doing active work in the yarden, which in any sane universe would mean I slept like the dead. BUT NO! The dead were restless! So I stayed up past midnight making a character in Oblivion because Skellington plays games late zomg, and then when my contacts were trying to peel out of my eyes I went to bed and still didn't sleep.

SO! I have had five hours of sleep, a triple-shot latte, and a nigh-inexplicable euphoric obsession with argonians, the race I chose for my new character in Oblivion.

Why, you ask?

BECAUSE THEY ARE GENDER-SWAPPING AMPHIBI-LIZARDS, THAT'S WHY.

Well, technically Lore says they change sex as part of life phases, like some fish do, so the term is 'sequential hermaphrodism', and I totally should have said 'sex', not 'gender,' but "sex-swapping' sounds way more like a particularly risky-life-style choice than a life-phase thing.

Anyway. The actual appearance of The Awesome Race of Awesome does not please me, so I drew them while I waited at my shoe-appointment today. Apparently they're supposed to be all lizard-y, but they come from the marsh and breathe under water and also I LIKE SALAMANDERS OKAY so I tried to make a humanamander. A Salamanaman. Amphihumibean. Thing.


They do not look like Bethesda's argonians. Bethesda's argonians have boobs. Fuck that noise.

Last night I was totally going to write something thought-provoking about the strong and weak points of Bethesda and Bioware games and how I love to run around Bethesda games for the first few days until I have more money than god and can slaughter the world, but all of my critical thought processes have devolved into I AM A SEQUENTIALLY-HERMAPHRODITIC ALBINO AMPHIBI-LIZARD WITH MAGIC, Y'ALL.

Comments

[stasia]

You made me crack right up out loud here at home. My cats now know that they're right - their human is nuts. Nutser than they'd previously thought.

So, I want more information about these Amphibihumibeany things.

Do tell!

Stasia

[westrider.livejournal.com]

OK, that just made my day! Wonderfully hilarious post!

You sure there were only 3 shots in that latte?

[shadesofmauve]

Hey, you know me -- the hyper-silliness kicks in with sleep deprivation (and it doesn't take much sleep-dep). The caffeine just helps. :)

[fenmere.livejournal.com]

Booya!

[opalgirl28.livejournal.com]

I love the Argonians. I struggled to play them, but I love them.

In TES III, they had unique walk animations and (amazing/hilarious) voice acting, but I don't recall if the females were flat-chested by default or if I had a mod for that.

If the PC was not one of them and walked by one in Morrowind, I remember two lines of their chatter: "Does the smoothskin want something?" and "Friend?"

Now I want to go home and fire up Morrowind (I prefer it to Oblivion, story-wise).

[shadesofmauve]

I never finished the story in Morrowind (or fallout 3. And I probably won't finish Oblivion). It's definite trend for me with Bethesda games. I don't find their stories that memorable or compelling, but when I want to just run around and be in a fantasy world for awhile, they're fantastic. (Except for the faces, but it looks like Skyrim will have Humans that Look Like Humans).

Oh, the stories I could tell of Morrowind. My housemate and I played it for about a week non-stop while we were snowed in. I don't really remember the story, but I remember how we decorated our respective houses.

So, yeah, my slight obsession is odd because I have encountered argonians before, but not when running on <5 hours of sleep + caffeine.

Morrowind is the only game I've played on the Xbox, so I didn't mod. I'm going to try to hunt down a flat-chest mod for Oblivion, though.

(when you post, the doctor smiles at me. Yay!)