shadesofmauve: (can we fix it?)
"What? There's no music in jail? It's like, it's like..."
"But what about Jailhouse Rock?!"
"ELVIS WAS LYING TO US! Also, you are not a hound-dog."

---

"It's like...mud racing...survivalism...how to extract water from elephant poop or something."
"Because there are a lot of elephants in Lewis County!"
"Maybe it works with cows."
"It's not very scientific, either. Just hold it above your head, squeeze it..."

---

"What are the most ludicrous publicity options we could offer?"
"Hologram."
"Skywriting."
"Graphiti."
"Check box if your program deserves tagging of: A) public Building. B) overpass. C) boxcar."
"For really small programs we'll just do stopsigns."
"Maybe...tattoos?"
"Oh, I know! FLASHMOB!"

shadesofmauve: (garden)
I just received a little wooden box for five years working at Timberland Regional Library.

I had never intended to go this long without going back to school, but since I still don't know what I want to be When I Grow Up, I'm not really complaining. I have a house, a boy, a band, kittehs... life's pretty good. Bear that in mind, cause the rest of the post may sound a bit angsty.

In the last year I've started to realize that I want to do something to help restore the natural environment -- native gardens and restoration are a Big Deal to me. I've done some volunteering, put natives in my yard, and done a lot of reading. I'd rather do something with direct consequences -- planning projects/planting rather than education/outreach, for example. I'd rather not let years of design experience go to waste, either. I actually LOVE the hands on part -- see icon! I get a total high out of mucking around in my yard, slowly making it nicer for the birdies. I WANT to do more volunteer work like that (Native Plant Salvage, Conservation District stuff). In a perfect world, I'd love to do work-work like that for a bit.

But the world, and specifically the bits of it that make up me, aren't perfect.

My 'sloppy' right knee and fused ankle aren't good at uncertain terrain. I can work in my yard, on nice even ground, for a few hours every day ad infinitum. I've worked on a sloping revegitation site for about five hours before I had to quit or collapse, and wasn't very useful the next day. The footing in most forest situations, or forest + slope, probably cuts the working time I can get out of my right knee and ankle down to about three hours.

Now we add in reynaud's. Sitting at the computer in a cool office is enough to start an episode, but it's easily dealt with if I have access to hot running water. It IS enough of an issue that I've missed a bunch of native plant volunteer opps this year, because I didn't think I'd be able to be productive given the cold weather. (This is taking into effect work gloves + glove liners + hand warmers, and it occurs in my footses too).

This is an odd realization. My orthopedic issues are congenital, so my interests and hobbies have tended towards more sedentary pursuits my whole life. The reynaud's started suddenly when I was 20 and rapidly progressed to the point where I'm surprised medical text photographers aren't asking to document my fingers, but it's usually considered an inconvenience, and rightly so.

I have honestly never encountered a situation where my physical issues were actually a factor in considering employment I might want before. It's... odd.
shadesofmauve: (Default)
The Olympia Timberland Library hosts a lot of author-talks. I think these two might be of particular interest to some people on my f-list. Click through for a higher res image on flickr. (Posters by yours truly).

OLPriest Boneshaker 201004 pstr

OL Febos Whip Smart 201003 pstr

Some of you know Priest, and someone here has to be interested in the memoire of a professional dominatrix.
shadesofmauve: (can we fix it?)
I worked 11 hours straight yesterday, including work I'd never done before (major signage) and work I'm technically not supposed to do (writing). That's probably part of why I can't stop sniggering when I read this. Really.

"Ride on "Santa's Express" to "Candy Cane Town" with B & E!"

It's the beginning of some ad copy for a children's program. The rest of it is fine (describes the program), but I can't get past "ride on santa's express" without gigglefits, and I'm pretty sure that indicates that there's something wrong with me.
shadesofmauve: (Default)
Ever since I discovered the Kama Sutra right next to Lo, He Comes! in the religious section of the Isaquah library booksale, I've kept an eye out for books whose titles are better together than they are apart. Combine two (almost) innocent titles, and Lo! He Comes! A whole new misconception emerges!

This weekend is the Oly Timberland Library's big booksale, and though they weren't shelved together, Michelle and I did find the beautifully bound Our Favorite Guns, coffee table edition, and two much-worn copies of Procuring Organs for Transplant*, a set of volumes that surely would have started some interesting discussion if we'd bought them together for living room display.

To top it off, one lady was so amused by our reading romance novel titles outloud to each other** that she bought me one, on the theory that I'd get more joy out of the title than anyone else would actually reading that. Yes, thanks to a random samaritan of questionable virtue, I now own The Boss's Wife For A Week.

*I had to look it up when I got home, because I keep misremembering it as Procuring Organs for Fun and Profit.

**My winner: One Night with a Sweet Talking Man. Michelle countered with A Scottish Heiress and The Captive Bride
shadesofmauve: (Default)
Why, pray tell, do I receive, from a librarian, a list of materials (books, cds, etc) which is incorrect and mostly plagiarized? PEOPLE, YOU GOT A MASTERS DEGREE IN THIS. You make half again what I do because you have a masters degree, and yet you persist in doing things that would have had me flunking out of 100 level art courses. It's pathetic. (For anyone curious - they stripped the subtitles off the listings, did the most minor of rewrites on the subtitles - we're talking adding "the" - and put them back in as descriptions of the works).

At the staff meeting everyone else has their own concerns, of course. Peg is just overjoyed that the much talked about New-Green-Form (which librarians will use to order posters and such) will be partially automated. It's been in the pipeline for more than a year and a half, and we're overjoyed that when you click "3 copies to Aberdeen, 6 to Centralia" it actually figures out that you want nine copies total!

Yes, we at the library are tentatively dipping our toes in the shallow end of the 21st century. Please don't splash, and for little fishies' sakes, don't steal our swim-noodle.

Jeff wants to have an idea of what our schedules are...such a demanding boss! *g* Nancy's is at the whim of animals, Devin's at the whim of school and I-5, and Jim-the-printer has another full time job and snags time when he can make it. It's perfectly understandable, but can be a little tough when you need to get paper ordered or clarify print specs before you send to film.

Peg suggested writing his projected time on the main calendar, but I'd rather get a spot-light and a printer-shaped gobo. Then when I had a burning print-process question, I'd turn it on, and far away Jim would look up and yell "THE PRINT SIGNAL! To the PRINT CAVE!" and come rushing over in his Printmobile, which is a 77 VW rabbit.
shadesofmauve: (Default)
I'm working on a poster for "Grown-up storytime: Shoeless Joe Comes to Iowa", and finding the whole idea lacking. If we really want to encourage voting, tax-paying adults to think the library is a valuable addition to their lives, we need to branch out.


Nancy suggested "Porn and Alchohol night at the library" as a way of attracting adults. She also willfuly misunderstood the "Tiny Teddies" program. This met with some opposition. So, I'd like to respectfully suggest "Adult Storytime: Alan Rickman Reads Erotica at the Library" as just the enriching program we've been looking for. Sophisticated, enticing, book-oriented -- it's got everything. Granted, the celebrity booking could be a bit tough. And we'd probably have to give ear-plugs to the childrens' librarians.*

Besides, you totally know you'd go.

I would.



*Childrens' librarians, taken as a whole, have got to be one of the least-laid demographics on the planet, right behind lepers. They exist in a state of ideal innocence. NONE of these people ever have kids. I'm not entirely sure that they know how it works.
shadesofmauve: (Default)
So, I was vaguelly amused by the "Pimp My BookCart" contest held by the guys over at Unshelved, and much more amused by the comic that inspired it.

So color me very suprised to find out that coworkers o' mine from Oly TRL won one of three runner-up slots! Check it out!" I honestly wasn't that impressed...until the third picture, where you see the hookah.

And, [livejournal.com profile] westrider, Garrett is our cool security guard friend with the interest in graphic novels.

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